Not the First Time
by AuronLu
Summary: PWP. A bittersweet liaison coming to an end between two guardians well-acquainted with death... and determined to seize a few embers of life before Auron says goodbye.


_Prurient Prose Warning: If erotica's not to your taste, hit that thar "Go Back" button! This was a double birthday present for a couple members of the Aulu community._

* * *

Besaid, sweet haven. For how much longer? The islanders had promised to warn them of any pursuit from Yevon, too loyal to Yuna to turn her in. Her guardians had fought sand worms longer than the temple, dragons in heaven, Yunalesca in her dark lair — there was nothing in Besaid's jungle that could threaten them anymore. Here, at least, they could rest.

Or steal away to a deserted cove for one last night's magic before the coming storm. It was still a risk, but there were unspoken reasons for selfishness. Reasons like _goodbye_.

Lulu leaned forward to adjust one of the stones weighing down a corner of the blanket spread on the sand, then sat back and folded her hands in her lap. "Pretend it's the first time."

"What?"

A warm breath that had no right to exist sowed goosebumps behind her ear. Auron must have forgotten his glove again; his fingers tickled her shoulderblades as he fumbled with her laces like a pawing teenager. The mage smiled in secret satisfaction. It was a game she seldom won, trying to topple his ironclad patience.

"Just pretend."

"Hmph."

There was a tantalizing hiatus while he shucked the glove. The clinks and creaks that followed meant his belt was coming off too. Strange how such minute sounds could induce such a profound shiver. The ocean seemed to be holding its breath along with her. There was a long lull in the crashing surf before another great salvo of breakers lifted up and toppled onto the sand with a palpable _boom_. The mage breathed out, savoring the rare moment of perfect contentment.

"On any other night," he said sourly, "I should have turned on my heel and left."

"Oh, Auron." She leaned back against him, liquid laugh spilling over stung pride. "Another of your admirable qualities: tact."

"And yours," he reminded her.

One, two, three, four: Lulu's hair-sticks slid free with practiced efficiency. Down tumbled tresses and plaits that would become a force to be reckoned with by morning. She arched her back in a silent purr as he paused to loosen a few braids, teasing the exposed strip of skin along her spine with the feathery plumes at the end of each plait.

"I suppose I should not regret being blunt, then," she said. "I still wonder what possessed me."

_Do you suppose that one of us could, just for a time, make the other feel like one of the living?_ She winced inwardly now at the ill-chosen words.

"That was no accident." Thumbs dug into her shoulder-blades. "You'd been watching me for weeks."

The rest of the memory made her chuckle: Auron's nonplussed expression when she stepped close to turn down his collar, the frown of realization just before she covered his mouth with an impudent kiss.

"Of course. I had to be sure of you. Even if you _were_ Sir Auron." She reached up to lace her hands over his. Their fingers flirted briefly before his hands circled behind her shoulders again, kneading.

"I see. You were simply looking out for Yuna." There was an edge of teasing in his tone, but approval beneath. "So when did you add me to the 'list'?"

The braided silk cord gave a short, sharp _zzzt_ as the knot gave way. Creamy full curves spilled out into the moonlight. Speaking suddenly grew more difficult as Auron's fingers glided over her shoulders in teasing circles, working their way downward. "When you let Rikku join us, even knowing she'd just tried to kidnap her cousin. I hadn't expected you to be so perceptive... or discreet."

"Not that list." His fingers dove inside the front of her corset and pinched, twisted, wringing a sharp gasp out of her. "I heard you the second night out from Luca. You weren't assessing allies."

"Oh, my." Her hips wriggled at a memory. "Idle thoughts, that night."

"They sounded intense." His hands resumed their wandering pilgrimage, lingering under her breasts.

"You seem to have been listening closely."

"You weren't paying attention, and you'd gone too far from the group. Foolish."

"And you were tactful enough not to barge in and order me back to the campfire? Not like you at all." The thrill of heat pooling between her thighs tingled as she let her mind drift back to that night, now sharpened by the thought of Auron as silent witness to an age-old ritual. "How long were you watching me?"

"Watching over," he said huskily.

"You liked what you saw?" She tipped her head back onto his shoulder, letting him see more.

"Maybe."

"Mm." Lulu reached behind, cupping a palm over something that didn't feel the least like _maybe_. "Did you... do this?"

His breathing roughened. "I was on duty, Lulu."

"But you thought of it."

"Thinking didn't have much to do with it."

"Ah, no." Her fingers continued to caress him through fabric. "And what if you had?" she said, lowering her voice to a throaty whisper. "And what if something else had happened that night?"

"_Witch_." He stopped fondling her breasts to grab her wrist, voice suddenly brittle. "Lie down." He retrieved the limp doll tossed carelessly behind them, shook the sand off, and rested it on the blanket inside the angle of his left knee. "Your pillow."

"Mmm, you _were_ watching." She gave a final squeeze and complied, smiling at the hiss of breath as her braids slid over his thigh. Mutely he helped her settle on her back, nestled between his legs with her head next to his lap. She drew up her knees, white skin and fishnets peeping through the open weave of straps that served as a skirt. He caught her wrist again, guiding her hand down into the jungle of belts, rumbling as his knuckles brushed against warm, damp silk.

"Touch yourself," he said.

Lulu gave a high, soft groan as her fingers burrowed down into wet folds. She began to stroke herself with a light touch. His hand lingered over her wrist. It was delicious having him there, silently witnessing every caress. She started to protest when he pulled his hand away, until she heard the rustle of fabric close by her ear, felt his legs shift as he adjusted himself. He worked more silently, but the knowledge of what was happening a few inches from her face made her cheeks hot.

Among other things.

She began to breathe his name now and again, so quietly that a voyeur standing ten feet away would barely have heard her. _Auron. _No, she had not dared such informality back then, not even in private fantasy. _Sir Auron,_ she corrected herself, lips caressing each syllable.

His faint, irregular grunts were a lewd counterpoint as her fingers moved faster. Wetness coated them well before she began to dip inside. Lulu paused to taste herself, raising her eyes to find his hawk's gaze fixed on her face. Suddenly more self-conscious, she smiled as she painted her upper lip to keep the heady scent under her nose. Chuckling at her incongruously prim expression, he drew his hand out and raised his palm to her lips. She licked the salty traces that were more than sweat and sighed appreciatively as he traced her upper lip too, layering his musk over hers.They reached out palm to palm, curling and uncurling fingers to tease with feather-tip strokes — a silent duel between hands more often used to deal death and pain than gentleness — then returned to shared self-pleasuring.

Auron's eye glinted above her like a star. The ocean's roar seemed louder now, as if the tide were creeping up the beach to catch them off-guard with a tongue of swirling water cast ahead of the break.

The wordless sounds flowing between them grew more primal. Auron gave a forceful thrust into his hand every time she hissed his name. Lulu felt as if invisible burning threads were flowing between their hands, sex calling to sex with siren's yearning. Lust, want and tingling pleasure began to pile one upon the another. The smack of her plunging fingers blended with his ragged breaths, egging both of them on: _faster, harder, more, more._ Auron's legs clutching the sides of her body were beginning to twitch and jerk; his upper body was almost doubled over as he rode the building wave, long ponytail swinging loose. Her buckles had stopped jingling; the belts were stretched taut as she strained against her hand, writhing weakly and squirming until at last her quivering shudders spilled over into a crashing pulse of pure ecstasy. She turned and pressed her face against his calf to muffle a scream.

Still hanging on the breaking wave of her own body, she felt Auron's muscles tensing around her like an upwelling wall of water rising higher, higher, higher before an explosive collapse. She lurched up from the blanket and rolled onto her knees, diving forward. It was hard to catch a moving target in the dark, but he sensed what she was doing and let go to grab her hair, pulling her down with a guttural growl.

Furling her fingers around clammy flesh that felt rock-hard beneath the velvet surface, Lulu cupped her mouth over the head where a bead of liquid was poised for her to taste. Her own sex was still pulsing in vivid waves as she began to lap and suck. He twined his fingers in the roots of her braids and gripped hard, bucking his hips to plunge deeply. She ravished him with shameless slurping moans, but not for long. They groaned together as he began to spill into her mouth in hot spurts, gritting his teeth around her name.

She drank deeply, swept away by passion's madness and the precious gift of Auron, Sir Auron, who knitted his very sinews together with a vice-like will, allowing himself to become utterly undone by the oldest form of magic in the world. The ocean crashed against the cliffs, and for a timeless instant, Mars surrendered himself to Venus.

Giddy, wanton, sticky and dishevelled, Lulu finally left him with one last lingering kiss, rolled over his leg and collapsed onto her side with a breathless laugh, looking up at him.

Auron arched an eyebrow, the bars and bolts of his face slowly settling back into place as he began to master his breathing. "Something amusing?"

"Mmm." Lulu didn't just feel alive, she felt _young_ again. But she would not spoil the moment by asking him if he, too, had felt a spark of life for at least an instant. It was hard enough fending off despair's anger, knowing that what she embraced was no more than an Auron-shaped hourglass, leaking away pyreflies at an alarming rate. There was no guarantees she would survive the last battle either, but by some other god than Yevon, at least they had _lived_.

She stretched luxuriously. "I'm not sure you would have let me do that, the first time."

He rumbled softly, a dangerous sound reminding her of that self-satisfied _hmph_ he gave after a particularly efficient kill. "No."

"No?"

"Suppose I had... barged in."

Her scalp prickled. Auron was not a man given to voicing _what ifs_ or regrets. "Well—"

He pounced. Suddenly she found herself being lifted from the ground, his left arm scooping under her shoulders and his right hand clamping over her mouth to stifle her gasp of surprise. His craggy face hung above hers, brown eye glaring down at her. "I would have asked you to give me _one_ good reason why a sensible guardian would risk leaving the group and our summoner for self-indulgence_._" Auron's grip loosened, barely.

Lulu's cheeks flushed. "I might have said that Yuna had four– no, three— other guardians. But that's an excuse. There is no _good_ reason._"_

His eye bored into hers, as if to say, _you can do better than that._ One of his fingertips rested against her carotid, making her keenly aware of her pounding pulse. It was a measure of the trust between them that she did not unsheathe every claw of lightning she possessed to free herself from his perilous grip. "All I could say is this. Sin rules everything: our lives, our duties, our deaths. This one small sliver of life I reserve for myself._"_ She breathed out, nuzzling his hand. "Little did I know then that Sin was a pawn as much as we are."

"Were," he corrected. His hand shifted, cupping her jaw and caressing her cheekbone lightly with his thumb. "You're no pawn now."

"_Auron_." Her arms slipped around his chest, fingers clenching uselessly. His choice of pronoun was a subtle omission, and no spell in the world could alter its antecedent.

"Hmph." His wry smile flickered above her for an instant before he came down in a crashing kiss, driving out any pangs of regret before they could take root. His tongue thrust into her mouth. She met his kiss fiercely, letting the rest of her body go limp in mute surrender. It was something to allow herself to be held by arms that could snap her spine, if fiend's madness took him. Chappu's gentleness belonged to another life, like sun eclipsed from memory by the thunderheads of the monsoons. Auron's rough handling suited the breakers, not the breeze.

He came up for air suddenly, breathing hard— real breaths, or habit? — and gazed down at her again. For an instant there was no storm or hero, just a mortal man: weary, weathered features fixed on her face with frank lust, seeking something that had been ripped from him ten years ago— longer, if he had stayed faithful to a monk's vows. His eye travelled downwards, surveying the scenic view she arrogantly permitted to leering strangers, and beyond to the ripe curves she denied them. _That's right, Auron, claim a little life for _yourself_; damn the world for its ruinous theft._

"So be it," he muttered, as if reading her mind. He caught her chin again and gently bent her over his arm, coaxing her into a graceful arch with her breasts as spreading peaks. He moved in, sliding his hand around to support the back of her scalp while he licked and nipped the white slope of her neck, her throat, the lush soft skin between her breasts. She let out another breathy sigh when he darted sideways, twirling a nipple with his tongue before his lips closed over it to suck. Lulu held him close, combing her fingers through his hair and loosening the thong binding his ponytail until it spilled free, tickling her ribs. He suckled and teased both breasts until she was mewling with faint whimpers lost in the ocean's roar. Finally he pressed his face into the ruff of her sagging corset, hot breaths beating her breastbone right through the fur. As erotic as that was, Lulu collapsed with startled laughter when he bit down on the fringe and gave an impatient tug— surely he'd just growled!

Auron pulled his arm free and shook it out before leaning low over her for another dueling kiss. Their fingers fumbled together by mutual consent, loosening laces and stiff fabric, flipping clasps on armor that should have come off ages ago, peeling away the crisscross straps on her sleeves, casting hauberk and corset aside, easing her skirt over her head and tossing his pants and briefs onto the pile. For all her straps and buckles, panties were apparently one nuisance too many; Auron's teeth tore through the thin cords on each side when he failed to drag them over her knees.

Skin prickling to gooseflesh in the misty air, Lulu lay back in thrumming anticipation as he started to settle over her. Suddenly he halted, hands braced on either side of her shoulders. She could see every crag and sinew in his knotted shoulders glistening in the fog-shrouded moonlight.

"Auron?"

"The first time..." His breathing was ragged. "Show me."

"Mmm." She spread her fingers, teasing the bristles of his chest, moving her hand in slow circles to map its contours. Applying pressure, she coaxed him to sit up again and followed, curling her legs loosely around his hips. So close, now– the siren's call of sex to sex was clanging loudly. Lulu resisted the urge for a little longer, caressing his muscles and scars and finding herself carried away by awe all over again. How could she ever take for granted this battered but still magnificent shell? His body was a weapon; it was art. Even the lines of scars and scowls marring his once-beautiful face gave him a driftwood allure. Just to be able to touch him— here or there, anywhere her hungry gaze cared to roam— was a precious gift. She buried her face in his loose hair and nuzzled his shoulder, letting her fingers wander.

"Almost every woman at the stadium wanted to do this, you know," she said, dropping a hand down to skim her nails across his stomach while her other inscribed meandering loops over his biceps and upper arm. "And some of the men."

"You have a vivid imagination."

"It got your attention, didn't it?" She bucked her hips suggestively, brushing against his growing erection.

He shuddered, arms folding around her. They drew together then, groping and touching, diving into noisy kisses and pulling away to kiss each other's cheeks, re-discovering how Lulu cried out when he thrust his tongue into her ear, how he stiffened when she playfully traced a line of unnatural heat down his chest. Sparks flew quite literally as the mage toyed with his flesh, tickling him with all the elements at her command. Auron ravished her back, biting down hard when she came too close to his groin with a ribbon of ice-cold water.

"Careful!" she gasped as he nipped a gleaming shoulder. "That's going to show."

"Potions," he said curtly: they certainly had collected enough by now. When he began to string a line of bites along her collarbone, her head flew back, exposing her throat to the same rough treatment. He stopped and made a soft, appreciative sound in his throat, watching her breasts rise and fall with every breath.

"I suspect—" he palmed one of her breasts again, toying with it— "at least two of our companions have dreamed of doing this."

"They can go on dreaming... just..." Her breath seized as he stroked her inner thigh. "Don't stop."

Gravity seemed to be winning again. Auron's kisses grew frenzied as a particularly impressive crescendo of surf made the beach tremble. She found herself falling, caught and lowered to the blanket. Her legs twining urgently with his. Auron lowered himself over her for the third time that evening. Hardened flesh pressed insistently against heated folds, and she held her breath, nails scrabbling at his shoulders.

"Lulu," he said against her temple in the profound whisper that others reserved for _in Yevon's name_, and pressed forward, back, forward, deeper with every thrust, making each inch another _first time_. Fully joined, they began to rise and fall together, deeply, slowly, letting the sea's music dictate their rhythm. Lulu cried out each time he rammed into her, timing his most forceful blows to coincide with thunderous breakers.

Eventually the drumbeat of pounding blood began to drown out the surf. Auron's grunts and her wanton moans wove a different sort of music. They plunged and rocked together, carried by pleasure's riptide until he tumbled over her with a roar, fingers bruising her shoulders as he pounded into her. She reached down between their bodies, squeezing two fingers inwards to fondle herself and feel the slick heat where their bodies were joined in intimate dance. He bit down on her earlobe, growling indistinct endearments he would never have spoken aloud. Finally she shrieked and broke, convulsing beneath him as burning ecstasy flooded through her, leaving her clinging and shuddering for many long moments before his face swam back into view.

Auron bent for another kiss, still moving in and out gently until his softened cock slipped free. They rolled together on the blanket, exposed skin chilled by the sea-fog, too warmed by each other's heat to notice. Lulu was still quivering, keenly aware of the delicious wetness seeping out between her thighs. She wrapped her legs around him, drawing an appreciative rumble as she coated his skin with fragrent, warm juices.

Auron continued to plash lazy kisses over her eyes, cheeks, lips. "Was that what you had in mind?"

"Oh, yes." She shifted her hips luxuriously, catching her lips against his jaw's stubble as she kissed him back. "I'd never have guessed it was your first time."

Ordinary potions were probably too weak to hide the mark left by his teeth in the soft skin just below her ear, but Lulu found herself amply compensated by his self-conscious chuckle. "You weren't the only one with a vivid imagination."


End file.
